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Showing posts from January, 2016

Self-Archeological Conversations #2: Hope, Passivity, (Self-)Responsibility, Boundaries - Podcast

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The second episode of our podcast is here! In it, I and my co-host Jackie talk about the concepts of hope, passivity (self-)responsibility, boundaries, and more. Get cozy and join us for an hour of self-archeology.

Self-Archeological Conversations #1: Preconceived Notions and Estimating People - Podcast

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So, a few weeks ago, we recorded a podcast, which probably will become a regular thing. In the first episode of Self-Archeological Conversations, I and my lovely co-host Jackie share our thoughts and experiences on ageism, first impressions, preconceived notions, and the value of estimating people objectively. So grab a cup of your preferred beverage and let's settle in for an hour of self-archeology!

"You're Judgmental and Bad" – Response to Common Criticism

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Yesterday, I published and article called How NOT to Raise a Boy to Respect Women, Himself, or Anybody – The Nikkole Pauluns of the World. In it, I describe the reality of child abuse and it's consequences, and reflect on how it is often approved in our culture.

When I talk about these topics, I often get emails and comments from people who are grateful that I am able to describe and explain it clearly. But sometimes I receive responses from people who get triggered, confused, or internally challenged, where they get upset with me and try to express it by acting out on me instead of self-reflecting and trying to resolve the internal conflicts, confusion, and trauma they have.

Today, I once again woke up to one of those emails in regard to my yesterday's article. The person writes [sic]:
Hi Darius,

İ ve been following you for awhile now.

İ work on " identity oriented Psychotraumatology"
By "finding your true self thru the words of the sentence of your intention&qu…

How NOT to Raise a Boy to Respect Women, Himself, or Anybody – The Nikkole Pauluns of the World

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A few days ago, a news story showed up on my Facebook feed, which was an “empowering” story about a proud mother who shared her experience in training her son to regularly take her, quote, “on a dinner date.” My mind immediately raised a red flag. Now, stories like this are nothing new, as the majority of people actively abuse, deprive, neglect, erase, and traumatize their children in thousands of ways, and it usually doesn’t even get identified as mistreatment of a child. But sometimes I am curious to see people’s responses to such things. So I took some time to investigate the story, and now I would like to share my brief thoughts on it.

So, a mother brags about how she is raising her son to “respect a woman,” and by that she means, quote, “how to treat a lady and how to take her on a proper date.” For some, it may be fairly obvious what is actually going on—but there still is a painfully huge number of people who believe that “a man should unilaterally cater to a woman,” “be a gen…